Talking to your kids about pregnancy

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When my husband and I found out that we were expecting a new addition to our little family, we weren’t quite sure what to do.

Talking to your kids about pregnancy

Oh, we were delighted about the news and couldn’t wait to tell our friends. But we weren’t sure what we should say to our three-year-old. Young children tend to like stability in both their lives and their familial structures. Announcing the arrival of a new addition to our little private group would be a big deal. It was going to shake the dynamics up in ways that we couldn’t entirely predict. We didn’t know quite how to go about explaining that to a toddler. And we certainly weren’t too keen on explaining the logistics of how mommy and daddy made another baby.

It was a bit of a difficult conversation, but it all worked out well in the end. Our children love each other as much as we love them. When the time came to explain that another baby was on the way, both of them were as excited as we were.

Here are some tips on how to have the talk.

It’s perfectly okay to gloss over some of the details. No, you don’t need to lie and say that a stork is going to swing by and drop your new baby off (does anyone seriously still do this?). It’s a pretty thin cover story even for a toddler and will mostly lead to more awkward questions. Still, that doesn’t you have to go all out and have the whole “birds and the bees” discussion now. Focus on the changes that are going to come and now on the hows or the whys.

Let them do most of the talking. There are bound to be a whole bunch of questions. Let your child voice any emotions that they may be feeling at this time. Different kids will react to the news in different ways, depending on their age and personality. Some may be thrilled about the prospect of a new playmate. Others may express significant insecurities or anxieties. It’s important to get a feel for where your child stands on the matter and then proceed from there.

Reassure them that not everything is going to change. Yes, a new baby is a big change, but that doesn’t mean that everything will be different. Remember to reassure your child about all of the things that will be the same. You are still going to love them just as much and they will still be just as important to you.

Explain some of the things to expect in the coming months. Pregnancy means more than mommy’s tummy getting bigger and bigger. Kids don’t need to know every detail, but it can be helpful to explain the timeframe and some of the things they may expect in nine months. Explain that you went through these things with them and that they shouldn’t be scared or unsettled by them.

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Expecting Expats is the online resource for parents in and around Thailand.

We provide lifestyle and medical content to our visitors, with new content posted daily. Our lifestyle contributors are themselves expat moms who share their experiences and lessons learned through blog articles. We also provide medical content from our partner doctors at Samitivej Hospital in Bangkok, Thailand. Articles of interest span from before pregnancy through the toddler years and cover medical, behavioral and cognitive issues.

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